40. Lung Capacity
As was already mentioned in Video Game Cliché #62, water levels are some of the most annoying things that video games can throw at us. So it's a good thing that most video game heroes have infinite lung capacity. I think it's somehow related to how 2D the hero is. Being particularly flat seems to expand your lungs quite a bit. Look at Mario. I've never seen him take a breath in a 2D game. Mega Man doesn't hold his breath either, but then again, Mega Man is a robot. As for Sonic, well, apparently he drew the short straw.
39. Ludicrous Weapons
Video game characters have the ability to make anything into a weapon. Princess Peach killed people with an umbrella in Super Mario RPG. Cait Sith killed people with a megaphone in Final Fantasy VII. There was even a guy in one of the Shadow Hearts games that killed enemies with a giant comb. What's really hilarious, however, is that weapon shops always seem to carry upgrades for these otherwise improvised weapons. Even more hilarious is that you find legendary versions of them in treasure chests.
38. Indestructible Doors
I can destroy the forces of evil with an umbrella, but I can't open a door with a crowbar. What sort of strange screwed up world do these video game characters live in? No matter how powerful your weaponry, locked doors will always remain locked until you find the key. Try to break them down all you like; I assure you that they won't budge. Maybe they're made of vibranium or something.
37. Indestructible Everything
Actually, scratch that. Everything in video games is made of vibranium. Go ahead and try to destroy some things in your favorite action game. Can you destroy a desk? Can you break a window? If you do manage to break a window, can you climb through it? All I know is that the fence that seems to withstand blow after blow from the sword that pierced Gannondorf's heart must be a mighty fence indeed.
36. Secret Characters
If you have a game with selectable characters in it, than most likely there will be secret characters. Maybe these secret characters are just shy? Come out, Akuma. It's okay. No one will laugh at your hairstyle.
35. The Reset
No matter how powerful you were in the last game, for some reason you'll have to give up all that power at the beginning of the next game. Some games, like Metroid, go out of their way to explain this, while others, like Mega Man, just sort of shrug and tell you to suspend your disbelief. Honestly, considering that in Other M, Samus nearly burned to death because she refused to use the Varia Feature before her superior told her it was okay to do so, I'd choose the Mega Man route any day.
34. Fighting Game Crossovers
Marvel vs. Capcom vs. DC vs. Mortal Kombat vs. Tatsunoko vs. SNK vs. NAMCO vs. My Buddy Steve… Fighting games will always do crossovers if they can manage to get the licenses for them. But why do all of these characters from unrelated franchises hate each other? To my knowledge, Wolverine never ate the last piece of cheesecake out of Ryu's fridge or anything.
33. Reversible Death
In video games, death is more of an inconvenience than a tragedy. Not only are there items that restore health and reverse death, but you have any number of extra lives, continues, passwords, save files, and so on. In short, you can always come back to try again. If only there were save points in real life.
32. Clay Pots
If you want an awesome place to store your valuables, try a clay pot. Clay pots in the world of video games hold everything from cash to weapons to even nonphysical ethereal "health." Sure, it's not the most secure place to store your valuables, considering protagonists tend to storm houses and break any pots in their vicinity while taking everything valuable you and your family owns. Come on! Really?
I had something snarky and funny to write about how it's really cheap to give a game protagonist amnesia in order to shroud his past in mystery, but I forgot what it was.
By Angelo M. D'Argenio
CCC Contributing Writer
*The views expressed within this article are solely the opinion of the author and do not express the views held by Cheat Code Central.*