Every so often, we sit down and attempt to calculate which video games have the absolute worst cover art ever produced. But after several hours on the Internet, and several phone calls to our therapists and optometrists, we throw our hands up in the air and admit that the numbers are just too overwhelming. And, while we may not have the stamina to write about every single assault on our visual senses, here are ten that struck us as particularly offensive.
I'm just going to get this one out of the way early, because making fun of the box art from the first Mega Man game is like kicking an old woman's walker. People have been routinely ridiculing this one for the last twenty years, and it deserves every disapproving word.
Honestly, every time I'm forced to look at this abomination, I'm dumbfounded by the fact that it actually got published. It's as if the artist hadn't even heard of this Mega Man fellow. And, judging from the box art, Capcom should have changed Mega Man's slogan to "Can you help this geriatric old man find the best chiropractor in Key West?"
I'm not going to pretend that I'm an expert in the field of baseballing. But even if I were, I wouldn't buy a copy of Tommy Lasorda's Baseball.
You'd think that SEGA would've changed their mind about Lasorda's endorsement when this was the best picture they could find, but clear thinking obviously did not win out. Just imagine what the other pictures must have been like for this one to take first prize. Scratch that. My imagination can't take that kind of abuse.
If you picked up a copy of Phalanx hoping that it would be another exciting game about hillbillies playing banjos, you were probably pretty disappointed when you plugged it in and found all those boring space ships.
Heathcliff has been ripping off Garfield for over 30 years. Sure, Heathcliff was technically published first, but nobody noticed him until Garfield showed up. Well, Heathcliff has obviously grown tired of exclusively plagiarizing Garfield and decided to branch out into Vin Diesel franchises. Good for him, I guess.
The Rushing Beat Trilogy consists of three games: Rival Turf! (1992), Brawl Brothers (1993) and The Peace Keepers (1994). All of these games are Double Dragon-style side-scrollers that cannot possibly be taken seriously due, in large part, to their suburbanized cover art. If I had to guess, I would say that Jaleco's catchphrase was "Jaleco: Games That Your Mom Will Love."