don't know any American farmers personally, but I
sure do know a lot of Canadian farmers. As some of
you may or may not know, I live in the middle of Saskatchewan,
for reasons that are still very unclear to me. This
is farming country, pure and simple. And many of the
farmers here may not be pure but they sure as hell
are simple. Yes, simple as in almost retarded. Not
all of them are, mind you. Especially not the ones
that have loaded guns in their trucks and know where
be it from me to make fun of the farmer, they do that
on their own. I'm simply holding a mirror to their
social behavior. I have nothing against the farmer,
I just don't care to see them or hear what they have
to say. Speaking of having something to say, I can
understand New York City cab drivers better than the
pigeon English some of these farmers up here dribble
out of their mouth. How come I never hear a doctor
or a lawyer with one of these immigrant accents?
Deere American Farmer is a sim. It's interesting and
realistic in many ways except that when you get in
trouble here in Canada the government will bail you
out with subsidy checks not unlike the welfare system.
I swear that all I ever hear in Saskatchewan is the
farmer complaining about everything - especially people
on welfare. I guess they don't like waiting in line
at the bank behind welfare recipients when they go
to cash their subsidy checks that they received from
is a business. John Deere American Farmer treats it
like one. It's not the most perfect sim ever but it
certainly teaches you about the dynamics of farming.
If you've ever wanted to speed down a gravel road
in your pickup truck with a dog in the back while
counting how many teeth you have left by viewing your
reflection in the your shattered side mirror, then
this game is for you.
make money as a farmer you have to sell something.
But you also have to have money so that you can spend
money to make money. That can take the form of crops
or livestock or both. You have 2,000 acres in which
to plant crops, maintain them and eventually harvest
them. Crops such as corn, wheat, sunflower and soybeans
may be planted but you'll have to consider your soil
conditions, moisture content and whether to purchase
cheap seeds or more expensive genetically engineered
of "whether," you will always be at the
mercy of the elements. Weather plays an important
role in the life of the farmer. It's can't be too
hot, too cold, too dry or too wet - although if you
ask a real farmer it's always one of them. You'll
also have to contend with other nasty variables such
as insects, plunging market prices and those crazy
your crop can deplete your available cash. You will
have to make decisions regarding pesticides, herbicides,
fertilizers and aerial spraying. You want to protect
your crop from damage or take measures to fix already
damaged crops but you don't want to spend one cent
more than you have to. It will eat into your profits
and you won't be able to afford those nice brown shoes
your wife pointed out to you in Wal-Mart that you
can wear to your nephew's wedding instead of your
crap-stained work boots.
can raise hogs, beef and dairy cattle. As in the case
of the crops you have to keep an eye on the market
price. Always holdout until the price rises. Then
take the one-hour drive into town with your left turn
signal blinking for the entire trip. Also, don't forget
to pull out onto the highway at the slowest possible
speed regardless of any approaching vehicles.
course you can't run a farm all by your lonesome.
You'll need to raise you a few kin and hire some help.
Your family won't cost you in labor as long as you
give them a place to live and let them have some interesting
leisure time - perhaps shooting at old TV sets at
the dump or at rural road signs. You'll also have
to treat the hired hands well or they'll get disgruntled
and leave. Perhaps you have a daughter or two that
you're not using at the moment?
here comes the catch. You're going to need farm machinery
and you can bet your ass it's going to be top-of-the-line
John Deere products. You'll need more than a million
dollars to get it all. A damn combine can be a quarter
of a million - and you only use the thing for a few
weeks out of the year. The game should give you the
option of renting or at least buying older, used equipment
which is what most farmers have to do when they start
out. Getting in debt too early in the game is a dangerous
are 10 different scenarios designed to test your strategy
and management skills. There is even a map editor
so that you can add a few options of your own. An
overhead view of your farm lets you see what's going
on so that you can make instant decisions on specific
situations. Graphically the game looks every bit a
budget title. There is no more detail presented than
absolutely needed to get the point across. Most of
the detail, obviously, is spent on the John Deere
equipment which looks as realistic as a catalog photo.
don't have to be a farmer to get into this game, but
even if you are, you can probably get someone to read
the manual and explain all the big words to you.