Postal 2
For PC Game/ Windows
FAQ/Walkthrough
Created by CuBiC
Version 0.66

______  _____  _____  _____  ___   _         _____
| ___ \|  _  |/  ___||_   _|/ _ \ | |       / __  \
| |_/ /| | | |\ `--.   | | / /_\ \| |       `' / /'
|  __/ | | | | `--. \  | | |  _  || |         / /
| |    \ \_/ //\__/ /  | | | | | || |____   ./ /___
\_|     \___/ \____/   \_/ \_| |_/\_____/   \_____/

(Thanks to http://www.networkscience.de/ascii/ for the ASCII)

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Table of contents.
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0. Version history
I. Introduction               'FINISHED'
II. Controls                  'FINISHED'
III. Walkthrough              '80% FINISHED'
  A. Monday                   'FINISHED'
  B. Tuesday                  'FINISHED'
  C. Wednesday                'FINISHED'
  D. Thursday                 'FINISHED'
  F. Friday                   'EMPTY'
IV. Weapons, items and NPC's  'FINISHED'
  A. Weapons.                 'FINISHED'
  B. Items.                   'FINISHED'
  C. NPC's                    'EMPTY'
V. Endgame-Ranks              'FINISHED'
VI. Cheats, secrets, glitches
VII. Misc stuff
VIII. Credits 'n Thanks


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0. Version history.
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Current Version: 0.90
---------------------

Sorry for the lack of updates lately, I've just gotten myself Legend of Zelda:
the Wind Waker and I've pretty much been playing that lately. The game is just
damn cool, the graphics are so sharp and clean it's almost like a dream. Another
reason is that I have both an upcoming exam and some kind of school project that
take up much of my time. So don't expect any big update the next week.

Additions:
- Alternative way of cashing paycheck on Monday.
- Serious clipboard-glitch discovered
- Added Thursday in the walkthrough.
- Added all of the items in the item list.

Changes:
- Removed some unneccesary sections(Review and FAQ)
- Added space in the walkthrough.

Version 0.66
------------

Additions:
- Hint on killing shopkeeper.

Changes:
- Reformatted the weapons section again and some minor reformatting of the
  guide, to make it more pleasant to read(I think).
  "Kudos to Capt. Falcon, Bio Hazard and Starvenus for helping me with this."

Version 0.65
------------

*NOTE*
I have changed some very faulty formatting in the weapons are. DAMN you notepad
for resizing. Oh, I just figured out that my version numbering was very wrong.
Now it's a percentage of how far I have come in average.

Additions:
- Finished Wednesday in the walkthrough.

Changes:
- Reformatted the last few weapons.

Version: 0.11
-------------
*NOTE*
Somehow I managed to forget changing the version number in top of this
document, so it read 0.01 instead of 0.10. Oh, well.

Additions:
- The rest of the weapons added.
- Finished Monday and Tuesday in the walkthrough.

Changes:
- None.

Version: 0.10
-------------

Additions:
- All weapons up to Gas can added.
- Almost finished Monday in the walkthrough.

Changes:
- None.

Version: 0.01 *unpublished*
-------------

Additions
-The intro and basic stuff.
-The endgame ranks.
-Some cheats, glitches and secret locations

Changes:
-None


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I. Introduction
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Hi and welcome to this guide about Postal 2, my name is CuBiC and I'm pretty
new to the whole walkthrough scene. Basically this is my first walkthrough
EVER, so bear with me if it looks a bit "unprofessional" at times. I got this
game because I had played the demo before and I really LOVED it. The way it
makes you feel free to do anything you want without anyone trying to stop you.
I decided to make this guide because there were no other guides up at this
point and I thought it would be really nice with a guide to it.

Anyways, if you have questions, problems or just want to contact me I can be
reached at mail on: cubic@fjomp.com. E-mails in hard-to-read language, full of
grammatical errors or in 1337 5p34|< will be ignored and deleted.
All I ask from you readers is that you don't use any of my material without
asking me first.


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II. Controls.
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This game uses the standard control layout that most FPS's out there use, the
WASD layout. Have you played any other FPS's out there this should be
familiar. These are the default controls, you can change them from the menu if
you like.

Movement.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Move forward\backwards - W\S
Strafe left\right - A\D
Look - Mouse
Jump - Space
Crouch - C
Walk - Shift

Weapons.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Cycle weapons - Mouse wheel
Weaponslots 1-10 - 1,2,3....0
Fire - Left Mouse button
Alternative Fire - Right Mouse button
Kick - Q
Zip up pants - R
Yell "Get down" - G
Commit Suicide - K
Throw weapon - Z

Inventory.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Next item - Right Bracket
Previous item - Left Bracket
Use item in inventory - ENTER
Quick-use map - F
Quick-use health item - T

Misc
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Quick Console - TAB
Console - Scandinavian keyboard: ø
          English Keyboard: ~(The key that is under your ESC key)
          (Thanks to David luecke, jdluecke@hotmail.com and Robert Klun,
           gouber@attbi.com for this.)


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III. Walkthrough
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I will not walk you straight through this game, I'll just give you some
pointers on how to do the different errands. This to give you the freedom that
this game intended to give you. The errands aren't so hard to find, just follow
the map. Detailed help is provided where I feel it's necessary.

Also, I'm going through the game on the average difficulty. The difficulty
setting in this game doesn't change more than the weapons of the NPC's and the
highest allowable weapon for any NPC and enemy. For instance, on liebermode
no one will have a better weapon than the shovel. If you see any big
differences apart from this, please mail me and I'll put it in.

*NOTE*
The errands are listed in the order I think they should be done, but once
again, feel free to do things the way you want.

*NOTE 2*
This walkthrough will contain spoilers in various degrees, if you don't want to
ruin the game just skip this section.

===============================================================================
A. Monday
===============================================================================

Errands:
1. Get Milk
2. Pick up paycheck.
3. Cash paycheck.

Errand 1: Get Milk.

The milk is, as you can see on the map, in the lucky ganesh shop. It's located
in the upper-right corner of the store and it costs 5 dollars to buy. It's up
to you if you want to pay or not. If you don't pay, get ready for a fight. The
storekeeper will come after you with a Machine gun, and he has VERY much health
for this early in the game. If you're low on cash, kick the ATM on the outside
of the store for some money.

*HINT*
The easiest way to kill the shopkeeper is to sniff some catnip and riddle his
body with bullets. If that's a no-go, try to get out on the streets, FAST.
Those cramped places are lethal. Either get a cop to do the job, or use cover
wisely and take him down slowly, but secure.

Errand 2: Pick up paycheck.
I strongly advice you to stock up on weaponry and healing items before entering
the RWS house. There's lots off weapons in the office complex to the left of
the RWS entrance.

As you enter the RWS building go to the left and follow the
hallway until you come to a set of double doors which say EXIT over them. Here
you go into the door to you right. If you want to, go over to the guy inside to
get a funny dialog. After that pick up the paycheck on the table.
Now watch the cutscene of the protestors storming the office and get ready
to run, or fight, whatever you feel like.

The fastest way out are those double-doors. Go through them, down the stairs
and be sure to pick up the weaponry on the table next to the door.
Outside there should be some protestors waiting for you at the end of the
passage to your left. You may try to shoot them, but remember that there are
some gas-pipes to your left that you can blow up. After that you are free to
go.

*HINT*
If you're low on cash you can go right instead of left in the RWS building.
Smash the window in the room at the end to find heaps of money on a table.

Errand 3: Cash paycheck.
Get into the bank and stand in the queue, or not. Just be warned, this place is
swarming with cops. As you pick up your cash, a group of robbers storm into the
bank. The cops and the robbers will start to fight and if you don't stand still
they'll start shooting at you too. Your best bet is too stand still and wait
until the battles are over, and shoot the ones who remain.

¤=============================================================================¤
| Alternate way mailed to me, from carl_nagy@hotpop.com                       |
| I took the liberty to rewrite it so it could fit into this guide            |
¤=============================================================================¤
|If you storm straight into the vault and pick up the money there, the mission|
|will be accomplished. The only catch is that the whole police group will be  |
|after you. This can be avoided easily, by going through the secret entrance  |
|behind the bookshelf just to the left as you go out from the vault. It's the |
|single one standing in the corner.                                           |
|                                                                             |
|Behind it is a tunnel with a little weapon cache. You will come out from a   |
|ventilation hatch in the seemingly meaningless building next to the telephone|
|company building.                                                            |
¤-----------------------------------------------------------------------------¤

After this, the next loadzone you go into will bring you home. This is the way
it is each day after you have done all the errands for the day.

*HINT*
If you go into the backroom of the bank, you can rob the vault and pick up some
other neat stuff there.

===============================================================================
B. Tuesday
===============================================================================

Errands:
1. Get signatures
2. Return book
3. Get Gary's autograph
4. Confess sins

Errand 1: Get signatures

Ok, this is an easy one. Simply go up to a person, with the clipboard in hand,
press the FIRE button and hope to get lucky. Get 8 succesful autographs to
finish this errand.

!!WARNING!!

If you get arrested before finishing the mission, you will lose your
clipboard. There is no way of getting it back that I know of at this time.
To avoid this glitch, suppress your will to kill long enough to finish this
mission.

Errand 2: Return book

This one is the errand I've been seeing most people asking for help about.
It's pretty easy, if you know the trick. One tip: GET WEAPONRY.

As you enter the library, note the protestors. You remember what happened last
time someone was protesting? That's right, fighting. Expect it to happen again.
Go up the stairs to the left, and follow the right wall into a set of double
doors. Go straight ahead into another door, and there you are. You can either
stand in line, or toss the book into the box on the wall. To do the tossing,
select the book in the inventory, stand in front of the box and press your
"throw item" button.

Now watch the cutscene with the protestors lighting up the library. When you're
in control again, go out the door you just entered and watch the inferno. The
flames are one-hit kills this time around, so don't get in contact with them.
There is one protestor with a shotgun waiting for you there to. After she's
dead, go into the door to the left. It's on the same wall as the door you just
entered.

Go up the stairs and shoot the two protestors there. If you try to go into the
entrance straight in front of you, some flaming wood will fall down and block
your path. Take the entrance to the right of it instead and shoot yet another
protestor. Take the kevlar and the pistol from the guard, you don't have to
shoot the charging protestor. He'll catch fire from some falling wood.

Now for the trick, this'll save you from about 5 protestors. Stand on the
bodyguard, facing the flaming wood. Turn 90 degrees left and crouch-jump(jump
and, in mid-air, crouch) over the bookshelf in front of you. You might get
on top of it, but that's OK. Aim for the table if you do. Safely down, go up
the stairs behind you and there's the exit.
Be sure to take away your gun if you don't want any trouble.

Errand 3: Get Gary's autograph

Another easy one. Simply get to Gary, stand in the line waiting for your turn
(if you want to).

When you get the book you'll see a cutscene about the police storming the mall.
Luckily, this time they are out after Gary, not you. The body guards will try
to shoot you on occasions though. You can either stay and fight, or run. Either
way, the fastest way out is the same way you came in.

Errand 4: Confess sins

This is also one of the places people have problems finding. When you get to
the trainyard area, look for a place where the road is supposedly blocked by
containers. There is a small route going under them, right behind the sign.
When you get to the church, go through the two doors, take a left and go
through the door there. Go right, noting the sign, and follow those signs to
the confessional box.

After you've confessed you'll see a cutscene of a fanatic blowing himself and
some priests up. When it's finished start backtracking your way to the outside.
When you come to the place with the medikits, there'll be two fanatics waiting
for you. One will stand in the open, one is behind a table. After dealing with
them, cut the corner to find three more(Two behind tables).

When you come to the hall with all the lights, lot's of fanatics will storm
you. They will most likely catch fire in a molotov accident though. If that
doesn't happen you're in mayor shit. That's very unlikely, since the "accident"
happened on both my runthroughs of the game. After dealing with those, there
are some more waiting in the courtyard, if the priests haven't taken care of
those that is.

Make your way out, dealing with any fanatics you meet. When you get to the
loadingzone, you're done with Tuesday.

*HINT*
If you go around the church, instead of in, at the start, there are some rifle
bullets and medikits behind there. If you take them, a fanatic will come for
you.

===============================================================================
C. Wednesday
===============================================================================

Errands:
1. Vote
2. Piss on dad
3. Get laundry (Gotten after piss on dad)
4. X-mas tree

Errand 1: Vote

Easy. Get to the cock asian and follow the signs. Get into the voting booth and
there will come up a voting screen. Click slowly three times, it doesn't matter
where you click, and you're done.

Errand 2: Piss on dad.

This is a loooong one, I'm going to go into details about this one since it's a
bit hard for first-timers. I'll give some descriptions on enemy locations and
stuff to help you out. Okay, enough of my rambling and let's get to the point.
Go to the church, like in the confessional, but go straight forward instead of
left. Watch out for any crazy fanatics. As you get out to the cemetery, follow
the path and eventually you'll wind up near a bridge. Go over and to the left,
the grave you're looking for is the one with dirt in front of it. Zip down your
pants and piss on the dirt.

Watch the cutscene with the two rednecks knocking you out and you waking up in
a box. Notice the new HUD and the lack of weapons. Climb up on one of the sides
and grab the shovel. Kill the two unarmed rednecks and make your way out of the
door. Watch the new cutscene to discover the "new you" and get the laundry
objective.

Up the stairs 4 more rednecks await you, one with a pistol, one with a shotgun,
and two with shovels. Take them out with a combination of kicks and shovel-hits
and go into the first door you encounter. There you'll get some of your
weaponry back, with the same amount of ammo that you had. Go through the second
door and find a room full of pipes, get through it and don't forget to go into
the door in there. There is your pistol and some of the healing items you had
before you got captured. After the pipe-maze is a boiler room with five
rednecks in it, take them out from far away with the pistol and don't forget to
use cover.

Make your way to the top and pick up any medkits you might need, and when
you're done jump into the hole. Safely down into the hole, make your way to the
end of the shaft while jumping over the holes. At the end, pick up the
healthpipe(You're gonna need it) and get up onto the pipes. Make your way back
the same way you came into the shaft, but on top of the pipes this time. Go
through the door at the end and kill the lone redneck waiting around some
corners with his back turned too you. Easy target for a pistol headshot. ;)
In the room the redneck is looking into there are three more rednecks, one is
high up on a ledge near the conveyor-belt. After you've killed them, pick up
your shotgun, machinegun and other weaponry behind the shelves in the back of
the room. Get up on the catwalk, this is a really good time to SAVE as this
part is a little tricky.

Get onto the conveyor belt and time your movement so that you run under the
crushers when they are at their highest point. As for the grinder, RUN through
just as it's about to hit it's top point. That took me a lot of tries to do. At
the end, walk on the edge of the giant bowl and into the next room. Just around
that corner is three rednecks, two of them are taking cover behind some grain.

After those are dealt with, you'll come to a place with a big hole in the
ground and some grain pouring down on the floor below. Down there are 5
rednecks in a cramped place, try to take out as many of them from that upper
level as you can. Then go down to rinse up. There is a big conveyor belt going
upwards, don't go on it quite yet. First kill that man on the middle level,
then you can go up. Get ready for trouble, 'cause you'll be transported right
up into the face of 5 rednecks. There's a few of them behind cover. If you've
gotten the hunting rifle, the part after this is really easy. If you haven't,
you'll have to be really careful and use lots of cover. Just be sure to pick
up the rifle from behind that desk thing.

On the other side of the walkway in the room you're in, 6 rednecks are waiting
for you. If you have the hunting rifle, just snipe them in the head. If you
don't, I pity you. Try to take them out from far away atleast. After those are
dealt with, continue on the path. You'll come to some winding stairs, with
three rednecks in. One on the top, one in the middle and one on the bottom.
Take them all out and make your way to the top. Near the top you'll hear the
familiar sound of a charging redneck(YEEE-HAW), why don't you welcome him with
a shotgun blast to the face as soon a he pops out of that hole in the wall.

Go into the hole he came from and continue until you see a redneck behind some
barrels. These will blow up, killing the redneck and removing a piece of the
catwalk. Be careful when stepping into the room as there are a total of 4
rednecks left in the room. Some of them could be burning now, but that doesn't
always happen. As you get into the room, turn left and jump to the catwalk
there and kill the remaining rednecks. Tired of rednecks yet? You'll be glad
there's only one more to kill before you're out on the streets. Get up to the
top and kill the last redneck carefully, he's handling grenades. After that
just go out the door with the loading-zone signs and you can enjoy your trip
to get the laundry.
Just don't get too angry at the NPC's responses.

Errand 3: Get laundry

Another short one. Just make your way to the laundry-place and pay the guy to
get your clothes back, or kill him if you want. Either way you'll get it. To
put it on, select it in the inventory and press your "USE ITEM" button.

Errand 4: X-mas tree

Here you'll meet those damn rednecks again. I wont go much into details on this
one, as it's really random where the rednecks are and it's a pretty open area.
To get the X-mas tree, just walk around in that park. You'll know when you're
near it, a sound that sounds like angels start and a cone of divine light
shines on the tree. When you take it, some rednecks will complain about you
taking their tree and start shooting you. Backtrack the way you came from,
while blasting all rednecks you see to smithereens. When you reach a
loading-zone you're all done with Wednesday.

===============================================================================
D. Thursday
===============================================================================


*NOTE*

From now on, it's not only cops that patrol the streets, but military and SWAT
people too. The military is basically a cop with a little extra health and a
better weapon, but the SWAT is DAMN tough. They seem to wear the toughest armor
and have more health than normal. When trying to kill these guys, use headshot
weapons such as Shotgun, pistol(not recommended) and hunting rifle.

Errands:
1. Get Krotchy
2. Get napalm
3. Pay ticket
4. Get steaks

Errand 1: Get Krotchy

As you close up on the toy store(which is at the exact spot marked on the
map), you'll see Krotchy himself. Not the one you're supposed to pick up, but
a person in a Krotchy suit. When you walk up to him he says there are no more
Krotchys left. But you know better, right. Walk into the store and go out the
door in the back.

Watch the cutscene with the two blacks discovering you in the backroom and, as
soon as you can, take out a gun and shoot them. Remember, there is plenty of
cover around here, so use it. Around a few corners, there are some medkits
in an indention in the wall to your left. Down the slope is a man in some sort
of office. Around the corner down there are three persons, one with a shotgun,
one standing behind some boxes with grenades and one unarmed. Take 'em out and
pick up the krotchy doll there.

Watch the cutscene where the police are storming the toy store and notice that
your wanted meter has risen. Now police will be storming you, so shoot them.
Now you should try to use cover as much as you can and backtrack your way out
the same way you came in. Just before you reach the door out you should stop
and wait until your wanted meter has fallen to zero. THEN you should go out the
door. (on a sidenote, be sure to ALWAYS check the batteries on your wireless
mouse bfore you start playing. Bleh :P)

Watch the cutscene where Krotchy insults you and get ready for a (boss)fight.
Krotchy is invulnerable to any weapon shooting bullet, but any other weapon
will hurt him. He has a rocketlauncher and a shotgun, he use the shotgun only
when you are really close to him. Otherwise he will continuosly shoot seeking
rockets after you. These you can blow up by shooting them. The easiest way to
kill him is to pummel him with scissors. Or you could just run out of the
store. ;) The "reward" for killing him is his rocket launcher, which is my
personal favourite.

After you're out, krotchy dead or not, that's it. You're finished with errand
number 1 for Thursday.


Errand 2: Get napalm

When you get inside the napalm factory you can either pay the cashier $300 and
walk to your left, or choose to not pay the cashier. The latter resulting in
the police coming after you. Once you get in, follow the path until you get to
a catwalk going up on your right. At the junction, take a right. Follow the
"will call" sign through the bending path into a big boiler room. In the boiler
room you take a left until you see a "will call" sign on the wall, and follow
it. Go left at the next "will call" sign pointing against you. In there go on
the first catwalk to your right. Follow that until you see the napalm launcher
and take it up.

Watch the cutscene where the scientist pukes on a control panel and messes up
the entire factory. Turn around and go back where you came from. Some barrels
will blow up and a pipe will fall down and hang from the ceiling. If you kick
the pipe, it will fly around with excellent physics. It's lots of fun for the
whole family. After you've finished playing with the pipe try to go out the
opening down there. Watch the poor scientist fall to his doom and go back up
to the napalm room by jumping on to the pipe. NOW go out the way you came in.
The flame that is spitting across the catwalk is unavoidable up there. To
avoid it, jump down on the pipe to your left and go under it while crouching.

Safely past the flame, jump onto the rusty tank to your right and jump to the
little section of pipe jutting out in front of you. Walk towards the catwalk
and you should JUST make it. Following the catwalk, go to your right at the
junction. At the end, face right and walk on the edge of the ash containers and
go into the hole. If you need health, ignore the right-leading path and follow
the vent to the left. In there is a room with lots of health. Go back and into
the path you just went by(the right-leading one).

Take a leap of faith down onto the pipes. This part is a little tricky, but
with my help it's pretty easy. Go on the rightmost pipe around the bend and
look down to your left. Fall down on the pipe below, trying to not fall down in
front of the crossing pipe, and turn right. Follow that pipe until you reach
the wall. Jump onto the pipe below you on the left and follow it onto the
ledge. Go onto the pipe to your immediate right and follow it, crouching under
the crossing pipe as you go. Watch the end fall of and walk over to the end of
the pipe. Jump onto the pipe in the right corner of the room, careful not to
hit the napalm on your way, and go up the slope on the pipe. Follow it up
towards the hole.

Go into the room to your left and watch the cutscene with the falling light.
RUN, and i meen RUN like hell, through the room trying to not catch fire as
good as you can. Halfway through the room the big round container will fall
down and roll after you, crushing you if you're too slow. RUN into the path to
your left and breathe out as the ball stops at the entrance. Follow the path
and go into the room up ahead. Go under the flame while crouching and go
through the room exiting it on the right. Follow the path into a room with
napalm pouring down into it. Jump on the floating pipes and make your way to
the exit ignoring the sound of falling stuff. Follow the path at the end and
listen to the scientist. Do excactly as he does, run through the path and jump
down into the water. After the loading, you'll find yourself safely on the
outside of the factory. Mission accomplished!!
.
Errand 3: Pay ticket

This one is easy. Just go up to the officer and push enter after he has started
the conversation. *POOF*, errand 3 complete

Errand 4: Get steaks

When you get into meatworld, watch the cutscene with P.dude complaining about
no service and do as he says. Go through the door with the loadsigns and wait.
Go through the nest door and watch ANOTHER cutscene. This one shows you how
much fun butcheres actually have when they make sausages. Directly after the
cutscene whip out a weapon and shoot the three butchers in the room. After they
are dead I advise you to pick up the shotgun shells that are behind the stack
of crates under the bloody metal "bar". There is also a medkit behind some
crates in an indention in the wall.

Done here, go out the only other door in the room. As you go in, 5 butchers
will charge you from a door on the right. There are no special things in this
room to pick up so walk through the door to the right. The one in the bottom
of the room, lookin from where you just entered. In that room another butcher
will charge you. Kill him and pick up the napalm and the cow-head if needed and
make your way through the next door. In here is a medkit and a gas can. Again,
pick it up if you need them and go through the next door. 

As you do, a butcher will charge from around the corner. Kill him and go around
the corner he just sprung from. Behind it is yet another butcher waiting,
behind a crate, to be killed. Do him a favor and put him out of his misery.
Under the stairs behind him is two machineguns and a kevlar vest. Go up the
stairs and through the door. Inside is a maze of boxes. Around the first stack
of boxes is a butcher waiting behind a "window" in the boxes. Shoot him and
take an u-turn around the next corner. A butcher will charge you, so kill him.
Look at the poor cow a second before turning around the corner, killing yet
another butcher in the progress. If you want to, go into the place where the
first butcher in this room was. There is a can of rocket fuel in there. Either
way, go through the door ahead. 

Go through the U-turn and into the next door. Right in front of you is a table
with two pistols and some fast-food. This is just a bait. Around the corner and
over the bridge a butcher with a machinegun lies at wait. Take him out,
preferably with the hunting rifle or the rocket launcher, and another will come
chargin against you. After killing him you are free to pick up the goodies.
When you've made your way across the bridge, a door awaits just around the
corner.

In the upcoming room another butcher awaits you behind a desk, guarding some
grenades, molotovs and rifle bullets. As you kill him, another butcher comes
charging through the door. Kill him and pick up the weaponry they were
guarding. The hunting rifle bullets will come in handy after you've picked up
the steaks, so I advise you to not use them before that if you don't have a
good reason. Anyways, go through the door and into the next room. As you get a
few steps into the room, a butcher will spring out from the corner and shoot at
you. Kill him and make your way around the corners. Down the stairs is a little
room with a shotgun, a medkit and the last door before you get the steaks.
Stock up on what you need and go through that last door.

The moment you step into the room, a fat butcher with a machinegun jumps out
from the left. Kill him and go farther into the room. As you come to the corner
a butcher jumps out from behind it. Another butcher is just behind him and will
come charging after you if you go around the corner. Kill them both and turn
around the next corner. Two more butchers await you, just kill them and make
your way to the into the little path that leads into a room. Dun-dun-dun-duuun,
you found some steaks. After picking them up, watch the cutscene with the
police charging the place. This time, they brought some SWAT's though. This
is when it's getting real tough. I hope you have some rifle bullets or some
catnip, else you're going to have a hard time getting out. If you get in a real
kinch, use some catnip with ENTER and they'll slow down the time, allowing for
easy kills.

I strongly advice you to pick up the armor and the machinegun before venturing
forth. Anyways make your way out the door you came in. Two policeofficers will
come charging down the stairs, kill them and make your way around the u-turn
and through the door. RUN to the next door and enter it. Take out the two
charging officers and run to the bridge while whipping your hunting rifle out,
if you have it. Kill the tree police officers charging from the other end of
the bridge and make your way across it. Go through the door and kill the
officer waiting behind it. Go around the U-turn and through the door. 

In there kill the officer in the little "room" and make your way through the
door. From the stairs, or the door if you used too long killing the first
officer two SWAT will charge you. They are very hard to kill by shooting them
in the body, but one rifle bullet to the head and they are toast. After they
are dead go down the stairs and straight ahead. Two SWATS and a police officer
will run through the door, kill them and enter the next room. One officer will
be waiting there, so kill him and make your way through the double doors. Two
SWATS and three officers await you in this room, also there may be one SWAT
shooting at you from above. Fortunately this is the last room of the butchery.
Kill them all and go through the double doors with the loadingzone signs next
to them and breathe out. You're finally finished with Thursday.


*More coming soon*


~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
IV. Weapons, Items and NPC's
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

===============================================================================
Weapons:
===============================================================================
I'll give you a quick description of every weapon, what I think of it, how to
use it and what it does in enhanced mode.

The setup will be as follows:

'Weapon name'
Description: A quick description of the weapon
Primary: What the primary fire does
Secondary: What the secondary fire does
Enhanced mode: Changes in the enhanced mode.
Ranking: ?/10. Why I ranked it this way
Tips: How to effectively use it


¤=================¤
|      Piss.      |
¤=================¤

Description:
Most of you should know what to expect off this "weapon". This is basically
what it is in real-life, a yellow stream of liquid that can be aimed anywhere.
Primary:
You piss. Nothing more, nothing less. If you catch fire, piss upwards to put
yourself out.
Secondary:
N/A
Enhanced Mode:
In enhanced mode, piss is MUCH more fun. This time around you piss napalm, so
if you piss on someone they catch fire.
Ranking:
Normal mode:
4/10. I don't find pissing so useful, except for putting yourself out. It's
fun the first 5-6 hours, but after that it gets a little repetive.
Enhanced mode:
8/10. FINALLY you can light someone on fire without pouring gasoline on them
and chasing them around half the map to get a match on them.
Tips:
If you want to play the pacifist way, piss is really useful. You see, if you
piss someone in the face they have to stop and gag. This gives you a great
opportunity to run away. Really useful in the areas where you normally have to
shoot your way through.


¤=================¤
|     Shovel.     |
¤=================¤

Description:
This is your normal everyday shovel. Low damage, but the real fun is that you
can hit the head clean off peoples necks if you hit them enough.
Primary:
A swing with the shovel, makes a cool 'DONG' sound when you hit someone.
Secondary:
A stab with the blade of the shovel, makes a gross sound if you hit a person.
You can't decapitate anyone with this.
Enhanced Mode:
Just like in normal mode.
Ranking:
Normal mode:
4/10. Only actually useful for fun purposes. Running around decapitating is
FUN.
Enhanced mode:
N/A
Tips:
Don't use this in a firefight if you have any other weapons, that's just
looking for trouble. If you don't have a choice, aim for the head and kick like
crazy. You kill faster that way.


¤=================¤
|     Baton.      |
¤=================¤

Description:
The standard police weapon, can only be obtained from a cop. This is actually
much like the shovel only with lower damage.
Primary:
A swing with the stick.
Secondary:
A "bonk" with the stick, makes a really cool 'BONK' sound upon impact.
Enhanced Mode:
Secondary fire may explode peoples heads.
Ranking:
Normal mode:
3/10. This weapon is completely useless for any other thing than the fun value
it is to use with the cop clothes. "Look at 'im oppressing us" makes more sense
while using this weapon.
Enhanced mode:
6/10. In enhanced mode this weapon is actually useful with it's headcrushing
ability. It's usually an one-hit affair with the secondary fire to kill
someone.
Tips:
Don't use this if you're not playing enhanced mode. That's about all the tips I
have.


¤=================¤
| Tazer/stun gun. |
¤=================¤

Description:
A little box'o'fun. This one shoots out electricity that run through the
victims body, effectively paralyzing it.
Primary:
Shoots electricity. Recharges over time.
Secondary:
N/A
Enhanced Mode:
Just like in normal mode.
Ranking:
Normal mode:
5/10. This gun is FUN(ooooh, rhyme). Also it's pretty useful for the pacifist
in those shootout situations that are so frequent in this game. Except for
that, it's pretty useless since you have to get so close to use it.
Enhanced mode:
N/A
Tips:
The best use for this gun is sneaking up on a lone enemy, zap 'im til you don't
have any ammo left. If it isn't a cop, the enemy will fall down, curl up and
pee his pants. The recovery time is long enough for you to run away or blast
the living shit out of the bastard. If the enemy has noticed you, try to dodge
the bullets the best you can while running against him. If you get close enough
you don't have any problems, since zapping them makes them unable to shoot
back.


¤=================¤
|     Pistol.     |
¤=================¤

Description:
This is a pistol, it shoots bullets, bullets hurt people. Nothing more you
should know.
Primary:
Shoots bullets, one after one. If held down it shoots bullets automatically
with a long delay between each. You're better off tapping it.
Secondary:
N/A
Enhanced Mode:
Just like in normal mode.
Ranking:
Normal mode:
7,5/10. A little weaker than it's real-life counterpart, this gun can take down
a normal civilian with two shots. Cops take more shots. Nice accuracy on this,
making it the ideal weapon for taking down people from afar. Before you get the
sniper that is.
Enhanced mode:
N/A
Tips:
Don't try aiming for the head, it's just a waste of time. The only way to get
pistol headshots is to get behind the enemy, be so close that the gun almost
touches their head and fire. Other than that, try running a lot while using
this gun, the gun is easy enough to aim with to do that.


¤=================¤
|    Shotgun.     |
¤=================¤

Description:
This gun shoots 8 small bullets that scatters. That means, the farther away you
are, the less bullets hit the target.
Primary:
Shoots a shell, making 8 smaller bullets fly out of the gun.
Secondary:
N/A
Enhanced Mode:
Just like in normal mode.
Ranking:
Normal mode:
8/10. Strong gun, bad accuracy. Up close this is almost always a one hit-one
kill situation with civs. This weapon is the only other weapon able to explode
heads, that's what makes it so cool.
Enhanced mode:
N/A
Tips:
If close, aim for the head. Chances are good that you will explode it. At any
other range you should get behind some cover, pop out, fire a shot, pop back
in. Repeat this as many times as necessary.


¤=================¤
|   Machine gun.  |
¤=================¤

Description:
A M16 looking gun that shoots like an M4. Really bad accuracy from medium
distance and out.
Primary:
Shoots a stream of bullets.
Secondary:
N/A
Enhanced Mode:
Just like in normal mode.
Ranking:
Normal mode:
4,5/10. I want to like this gun, but I can't due to the really low damage it
deals. It doesn't even support headshots. A civ takes almost 8 shots to bring
down, I don't want to talk about how many shots a SWAT takes. It would have
been okay if there were headshots, but sadly there aren't any.
Enhanced mode:
Just like in normal mode.
Tips:
If you really want to use this gun, use it in combination with catnip. In slomo
this is one of the best guns, since the enemy wont even manage to turn against
you before he's got his body riddled with bullets. If you don't have any
catnip, use cover wisely.


¤=================¤
|    Gas can.     |
¤=================¤

Description:
A can full of flammable goodness. Comes complete with a set off matches.
Primary:
Hold down to pour gasoline. Pouring in one spot makes a big puddle that makes
a nice explosion when lit.
Secondary:
Throws a match.
Enhanced Mode:
Just like in normal mode.
Ranking:
Normal mode:
8/10. This weapon is pure fun, and it's useful too. One successfully lit up
enemy can clear a whole room if you're lucky.
Enhanced mode:
N/A
Tips:
Instead of pouring the gasoline on people, try pouring a line of it in their
path and lighting it when they stand close to it. Since they freak out and run
away when you pour it on them, this is a less tedious way to light them up.


¤=================¤
|    Grenades.    |
¤=================¤

Description:
A bouncing sphere of explosive goodness. "Mommy, look. They go BOOOM!" ;)
Primary:
Throw the grenades, hold the button down to decide strength.
Secondary:
Drop the grenades as proximity mines, kick them around to move them. Careful
though, you can only kick them three times before they blow.
Enhanced Mode:
Just like in normal mode.
Ranking:
Normal mode:
9/10. Now this is fun. Shooting someone in the leg, putting a grenade in their
path and letting them crawl to their deaths is one of my best moments in this
game. It's useful too, since it kills incredibly fast(if it hits).
Enhanced mode:
N/A
Tips:
Learn to aim the sucker and its one of the most useful weapons in the game.
Just throw it and watch the enemies be blown to smithereens.


¤====================¤
| Molotov cocktails. |
¤====================¤

Description:
A bottle of fiery fun. Light the match and throw to engulf an area in flames.
Oh, and it kills people too.
Primary:
Lighting the match and throwing the bottle, making it explode on contact with
the ground or any NPC being unfortunate too stand in it's path.
Secondary:
Lighting the match and placing the bottle on the ground. Explodes after a
set time-limit, or if you shoot it.
Enhanced Mode:
Just like in normal mode.
Ranking:
Normal mode:
7/10. Not quite as useful as the grenade, because of it being flamebased. This
means it won't kill the later enemies, like the SWAT and military, as easy.
It's always a risk of you being caught in flames if your victims run into you.
It's still really fun though.
Enhanced mode:
N/A
Tips:
Try not to use this on the later enemies, they'll just put themselves out.
Other than that, don't aim for a single person if you don't have too. Large
groups of people are easier to kill if you throw it between them.


¤=================¤
|    Scissors.    |
¤=================¤

Description:
Your normal everyday office scissors, used in a little special way.
Primary:
Throws the scissors straight forward.
Secondary:
Richocheting scissors! They are like normal scissors, except they bounce on
walls.
Enhanced Mode:
Just like in normal mode.
Ranking:
Normal mode:
4/10. They damage way too little to be any good. The richocheting scissors
take too long to throw too.
Enhanced mode:
N/A
Tips:
I don't really have any, since I never use any.
-If you think you have a good strategy for the scissors, mail me at
 cubic@fjomp.com-


¤====================¤
| Diseased cow head. |
¤====================¤

Description:
A cow head, filled with anthrax. How cool is that.
Primary:
Thrusting the head forwards, damaging the person it hits. It starts leaking
anthrax at the point it hits something.
Secondary:
Puts the head down on the ground. Starts leaking anthrax after a little while.
Enhanced Mode:
Just like in normal mode.
Ranking:
Normal mode:
7/10. A little hard to hit with, but apart from that it's good. When the
anthrax hit a person, the person runs around screaming a bit then stops to puke
blood and die. O_o It's worth 5/10 for the coolness rating alone.
Enhanced mode:
N/A
Tips:
Throw it into a group of persons and watch the ensuing carnage. If you want
more anthrax fast, just shoot the head until it explodes.


¤=================¤
| Hunting rifle.  |
¤=================¤

Description:
A rifle with a scope. If shot to the head, it's a one-hit kill. Anywhere else,
the victim falls to the ground and starts crawling around.
Primary:
Shoots the rifle.
Secondary:
Goes into scope mode. Use mousewheel to zoom.
Enhanced Mode:
Shoot exploding bullets!
Ranking:
Normal mode:
9/10. One of my favourite weapons, due to the one-hit kill effect it has. Also
cool in combination with grenades(see grenade description for details). Tends
to get you confused if you turn a lot in zoom-mode.
Enhanced mode:
9,5/10. Now this is tha' bomb. Exploding bullets sends your victims flying.
It's sore part is that it takes more shots to kill a SWAT now, since they cope
with explosions better then a slug to the head.
Tips:
Zoom in, locate head, fire. In enhanced mode you should aim for the feet, or
inbetween people in large groups.


¤==================¤
| Rocket Launcher. |
¤==================¤

Description:
A GIANT launcher of rockets. Uses fuel for ammo. The longer the fire button is
held, the longer the rocket flies.
Primary:
Normal rocket, until completely charged. Then it enters seeking mode, tracking
down the victim of your choice(or it's choice, should you forget giving it a
target).
Secondary:
Normal, straight firing rocket.
Enhanced Mode:
Just like in normal mode.
Ranking:
Normal mode:
10/10. The best weapon in the game, only rivaled by the napalm launcher. It's
fire and forget function is pretty neat, and it pays firing a seeking rocket
into an unchecked room. It cracks me up seeing a NPC running for it's life with
the rocket in its heels, then suddenly the rocket decides to accelerate and
BOOM the NPC goes.
Enhanced mode:
N/A
Tips:
Nice room cleaner. If in doubt about whether or not there are enemies in a
room, fire a seeking rocket into it and see if it finds anything.


¤==================¤
| Napalm Launcher. |
¤==================¤

Description:
Gotten as a weed-remover in the game, this can also serve other purposes. Like
burning 10 to 20 NPC's in one shot.
Primary:
Shoots a canister. The canister starts leaking napalm right away, but explodes
as it hits something.
Secondary:
Shoots a canister. The canister starts leaking after it has bounced once and
explodes when it hits flames.
Enhanced Mode:
Just like in normal mode.
Ranking:
Normal mode:
10/10. Much like the molotov, only much, much better. Is capable of burning up
to hundreds of NPC's in one shot if fired right. This is the queen of the
weapons in Postal 2.
Enhanced mode:
N/A
Tips:
If fired into open areas, use primary fire and aim high. In cramped places, use
secondary and try to predict where you should fire to get the most spreading of
napalm. Is also a nice room cleaner. Listen for screams when you fire it into
enemy territory, this'll tell you if there are any enemies there.

===============================================================================
Items
===============================================================================

¤=================¤
|   Alternator.   |
¤=================¤

This item is gotten on Friday, in the "pick up alternator" mission. It doesn't
serve any purpose, it's just there to show you that you have completed the
mission.

¤=================¤
|      Book.      |
¤=================¤

This is also an item that's just there to show you that you've completed a
mission. This one is gotten on Tuesday, in the "return book" mission.

¤=================¤
|      Cat.       |
¤=================¤

A normal cat, gotten almost anywhere in the town. Comes in many different
colours. It's main use is as a silencer on the shotgun and the machinegun. Can
also be used as a living torch for all your firey needs.

¤=================¤
|     Catnip.     |
¤=================¤

A box with green goo in it. Attracts nearby cats if dropped, and can be picked
up again if no cat has opened the lid yet. If you use it with your "use item"
key, you'll go into slomo. You will go at normal speed, but everything around
you will go at half it's speed. Normally gotten at hard-to-reach places.

¤=================¤
|    Clipboard.   |
¤=================¤

Used only one time and is then discarded. It is part of the mission "get
signatures" on Tuesday and is gotten at the start of that day. Isn't actually
used as an item, but replaces the hands.

¤=================¤
|   Cop clothes.  |
¤=================¤

What the name says, a set of cop clothes. If you put them on you will appear to
the other cops as a fellow cop. They won't attack you if you have your weapon
out and they will actually help you out if anyone shoots at you. Gotten in the
third floor of the police station and at the laundromat some days.

¤=================¤
|   Dog treats.   |
¤=================¤

Looks like a brown little bone, this can be used to train attackdogs. When
dropped in front of a dog, the dog will eat it and after eating enough it will
turn to your side and attack anyone you attack. If you try to use it with the
"use item" button, P.dude will try to eat it and then starts to cough. This
doesn't make you lose any health. Can be picked up in boxes or as individual
treats.

¤=================¤
|     Donuts.     |
¤=================¤

Is used for healing mostly, but can also be used for luring cops into traps.
Also good for training dogs when you're out of dog treats. Gives 3 health
points if eaten. Gotten from dead cops, food stores or scattered around the
map.

¤=================¤
|  Dude clothes.  |
¤=================¤

This is the normal clothes you wear at the start of the game. Is only available
in the mission "get laundry" and gotten from the guy in the laundromat. Is grey
with a blue alien on.

¤=================¤
|    Fast food.   |
¤=================¤

Used for healing only. Gives you 10 health points when eaten. Looks like a
paper bag with a heart inside a 'C' on. Found by killing people, in food stores
or scattered around the map.

¤=================¤
|  Gary's book.   |
¤=================¤

This is the book you get when you finish the "get gary's signature" mission.
Serves no other purpose than that off showing you that you've completed this
mission. Looks like a book with the picture of gary's head on the outside.

¤=================¤
|      Gift.      |
¤=================¤

This is the gift you start with on Friday. You are supposed to give this to
uncle Dave in the mission "Uncle Dave's Birthday". Looks like a white package
with spots on.

¤=================¤
|  Gimp clothes.  |
¤=================¤

The clothes the rednecks put on you when you are doing the mission "piss on
dad". Makes you look just like the gimp in the "fire in the hole" bar. Can be
removed by putting on the dude clothes or the cop clothes.

¤=================¤
|   Health pipe   |
¤=================¤

The ultimate healing device. Gives you 125 health, regardless of how much
health you have. Makes you addicted, resulting in a loss of health if not taken
regularly. A good way to tell if you have to take a new one is the heart icon
above your health. When it starts to get REALLY big, beat really fast and
P.dude starts to say he feels like shit, it's time for another hit. Can be
bought in stores, found on dead bodies or scattered around the map. Looks like
a yellowish pipe thingy.

¤=================¤
|  Kevlar armor.  |
¤=================¤

Gives you 100 armor points when picked up. Looks like a thick blue vest.
Makes you able to withstand more bullets by absorbing the impact of them. Can
be found in some house, on dead SWAT's and military people and scattered around
the map.

¤=================¤
|     Krotchy.    |
¤=================¤

Serves only one other purpose than that off showing you that you have finished
the "get krotchy" mission. It also makes some fun statements when you press the
"use item" button while you have it selected. Looks like a box with a miniature
krotchy in it. It's only found in the back of the toy store.

¤=================¤
|      Map.       |
¤=================¤

Gotten at the start of the game and can not be thrown away. When used it shows
the current map, objectives and positions.

¤=================¤
|     Medkit.     |
¤=================¤

Looks like a white box with a red cross on. Gives you 30 health points when
picked up. Found in ALL fighting missions, in the hospital and in various on
the map.

¤=================¤
|      Milk.      |
¤=================¤

Another of those mission cleared evidences. Gotten on Monday in the "get milk"
mission. Looks like a carton of milk with jihad milk printed on the side.

¤=================¤
|     Money.      |
¤=================¤

Aaaah, money. The root to all evil. In this game that surely is the case as
money can buy anything from healthpipes to cats for use as silencers. You
should always carry some of this. Gotten in most houses, from dead bodies, the
bank and also a few positions on the map. Looks like a little heap of bills.

¤=================¤
|    Newspaper.   |
¤=================¤

Gotten at the start of each day. Shows you the latest headlines from paradise.
Is always lying in front of your house at the start of the day and looks like
a rolled up paper.

¤=================¤
|     Parcel.     |
¤=================¤

Traded in for the package in Fridays mission: "pick up package". Serves no
other purpose than this. Gotten at the start of the day. Looks like a sheet of
paper with some writing on it.

¤=================¤
|    Paycheck.    |
¤=================¤

Gotten from Vince's office in the mission "pick up paycheck" on Monday. Traded
in for money later in the next mission. Looks like a sheet of paper with
writing on it.

¤=================¤
|     Pills.      |
¤=================¤

Gotten as a cure for the gonnorhea you get on Friday. Can only be used once,
but isn't actually needed more. Cures the gonnorhes so you piss normal piss
again. Looks like a glass with pills in it.

¤=================¤
|     Pizza.      |
¤=================¤

Used only for healing and gives you 5 health points when eaten. Looks like a
slice of everyones favourite italian food, pizza!!(Ok, not everyone, but you
know what I meant ;)) Gotten from dead bodies, food stores and various
locations on the map.

¤=================¤
|     Radar.      |
¤=================¤

When used, this item gives you a radar for a limited amount of time. The more
radars you pick up, the more time you get. There are also plugins for the radar
that expands it's usability. Gotten in your shed and in various locations on
the map. Looks like a round yellow thing with a screen on. Has the word Bass
sniffer on, with the B barely visible.

¤============================¤
| Radar plugin: Chompy game. |
¤============================¤

This plugin lets you play a happy game on the radar. Basically, you stear a red
fish icon around the radar to eat other fish on the radar. When you hit a fish,
the point of view changes to the person that fish represents. That person is
then bitten by the icon until it dies. You have 10 seconds to eat as many fish
as possible and you stear with the WASD keys. Depending on how many fish you
eat you get prizes. Is gotten on some very hidden places in the game and is
very rare. Looks like a little box with a red fish on it. Remember, chompy is
best played in a spot where there are many people on your radar and you are
invincible while using it.

¤===========================¤
| Radar plugin: Cop plugin. |
¤===========================¤

This plugin marks the fish on the radar that are police. Is gotten on some
not-so hidden places. Looks like a little box with a big, curled up green fish
on it.

¤===========================¤
| Radar plugin: Gun plugin. |
¤===========================¤

This plugin marks the fish on the radar that have guns. Is gotten on some
not-so hidden places. Looks like a little box with a small green fish on it.

¤=================¤
| SiC body armor. |
¤=================¤

Kevlar armor with Silicon carbide Ceramic plates in it. 
Gives you 200 armor points when picked up. Looks like a thick brown vest.
Makes you able to withstand more bullets by absorbing the impact of them. Can
be found in some house, on dead SWAT's and military people and scattered around
the map.

¤=================¤
|     Steaks.     |
¤=================¤

ANOTHER of those "mission cleared" evidence. This one is gotten in one of the
hardest missions in the game, the "pick up steaks" mission on Thursday. Looks
like a styrofoam box with steaks in it. Is found deep into the meat world
building.

¤=================¤
|   X-Mas tree.   |
¤=================¤

YET another of those "mission cleared" evidence. This one is gotten on
Wednesday on the "X-mas tree" mission. Picked up in a far away corner off the
map and serves no purpose whatsoever. Looks like a small X-mas tree(surprise!)
and is far to big for being held in P.dude's back pocket.

===============================================================================
NPC's
===============================================================================
**Coming soon**


~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
V. End-game Ranks
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Ok, this is a complete list of all the ranks you can get from completing the
game. These don't give you anything extra, but they may be something to brag
about.
These are verified to be correct by me, as I peeked through the code to find
them all.


Message: Thank you for playing, JESUS.
Requirement: 0 people and animals killed.

Message: Gun-shy Murderer
Requirement: Under 5 people killed.

Message: Underachieving Thug
Requirement: Under 50 people killed.

Message: Wanna-be Gangsta
Requirement: Under 100 people killed.

Message: Soccer Mom
Requirement: Under 300 people killed.

Message: Office Drone Pushed over the Edge
Requirement: Under 600 people killed.

Message: Prozac-Powered Gun Nut
Requirement: Under 800 people killed.

Message: Serial Killer on Steroids
Requirement: Under 1000 people killed.

Message: Society-Shunning, Grade-A Psycho
Requirement: Under 1500 people killed.

Message: Ex-Military Killing Machine
Requirement: Under 2000 people killed.

Message: Hilter would be proud.
Requirement: Under 4000 people killed.

Message: Congratulations, SATAN.
Requirement: Over 4000 people killed.

Message: Cop Killer
Requirement: 3/4 of the people killed were cops.

Message: PETA-Hating, Animal Murderer
Requirement: More animals than people killed.

Message: Teen Sniper
Requirement: Over half your kills were rifle headshots.

Message: Arsonist
Requirement: Over half your kills were by burning.

Message: Water Sports Enthusiast
Requirement: The number of gallons pissed are higher than the number of kills

Message: Cat Rapist
Requirement: Over 40 cats used on guns

Message: Congratulations! We didn't think this was even possible!
Requirement: Finish the game on Hestonmode.


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VI. Cheats, secrets, glitches
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Cheats.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
To enable cheatmode open the console and type 'sissy'(without the quotes).
Postal dude will say something if you've done it correctly. Then you can enter
any of these cheats.

alamode:
* Gives you invincibility. Type again to turn off.

packnheat:
* Gives you all the weapons in the game with a little ammo.

payload:
* Gives you 999 ammo on all current weapons.

iamsolame:
* All the three above. Gives you all the weapons with 999 ammo and turns you
  invincible.

piggytreats:
* Adds 20 donuts to your inventory.

jewsforjesus:
* Adds $5000 to your inventory.

boyandhisdog:
* Adds 20 doggy treats(for training attack dogs) to your inventory.

jones:
* Adds 20 Health Pipes to your inventory.

swimwithfishes:
* Gives you a radar and the two plugins for it.

fireinyourhole:
* Rocket camera!!! This is fun. When you fire a rocket, you change views to
  the rockets and you can steer it with the WASD keys. Just remember, W is
  down, S is up and the rockets are REALLY fast.

iamtheone:
* Gives you a lot of catnip to attract cats with(or go into slowmo).

lotsapussy:
* Adds 20 cats for use as silencers to your inventory.

blockmyass:
* Gives you bodyarmor.

smackdatass:
* Gives you the gimp suit.

iamthelaw:
* Gives you cop clothes.

healthful:
* Gives you health.

whatchutalkinbout:
* Turns every normal NPC's(not cops, army or swat) into gary colemans.

osama:
* Turns every normal NPC's(not cops, army or swat) into fanatics.

rockingcats:
* Makes the weapons that are able to have cats on them, shoot cats. Very fun
  with the machine gun. Turn off with 'dokkincats'.

slomo:
* Makes everything around you go in slomo. You will go at normal speed though.
  To turn off type 'slomo 1'.

fly:
* Gives you the ability to fly. Turn off by typing 'walk'.

ifeelfree:
* Ghostmode. Same as above, but now you can go through walls. Turn off by
  typing 'walk'.

-You have any more cheats? Please send them too cubic@fjomp.com-


Secret locations.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
These are for the most ammo stashes on hard-to-reach places, but some of these
also have a fun value to them.

* In the backroom of the Lucky Ganesh(where you go to get milk) there is a
  wooden grating over a hole in the upper-left corner of the first room,
  looking from the door. Shoot this, strangely it bleeds, and jump into the
  hole. Follow the path and don't be afraid to jump down the long shafts, there
  are medipacks along the way. At the end there is a pit, and down there are
  some zombie dogs, a rocket launcher and some grenades. Be careful, as the
  zombie dogs are invincible.

-You have any more secret locations? Please send them too cubic@fjomp.com-

Glitches.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
* If you pour gasoline in the area between the bottles on the second floor of
  cock asian, a flame beam will shoot across the room. Actually very neat to
  look at.

* If you get arrested while you still have the clipboard on Tuesday, there is
  NO way you can get it back. So finish the signature mission before you start
  fooling around.

* If you get arrested while using the chompy game, you will stay invincible all
  the time until you use chompy again.
  (Submitted by: Steven, gtg842@mail.gatech.edu)

-You have any more glitches you are able to reproduce? Please send them too
 cubic@fjomp.com-


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VII. Misc. stuff
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A. Mods
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Name: (Fun)Damage mod v 0.7 by yours truly.
Link: http://home.halden.net/postal/mods/damagemod.zip
Rank:  It wouldn't be fair of me to rank my own mod, now would it.
Review: Look above.
Features:
  - Easier headshots with pistol, shotgun, machinegun and shovel.
  - The ability to kick off peoples heads.
  - Lowered damage to body with pistol, shotgun, machinegun and shovel(makes
    for easier NPC's).
  - Doubled the firing rate on the machine gun and added crosshair when unarmed
    to help you aim your foot.

*NOTE*
Since meatlocker has been taken down, the mods hosted there has been removed.
I'll repost them as soon as I get some other URL's for them.


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VIII. Credits 'n thanks
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My thanks go out to:
Running With Scissors - For making the best game so far.
Capt Falcon, Bio Hazard, Onrefi the bum and Starvenus - For giving me some
pointers on formatting.
My computer - For not failing me for 5 years.
My family - For errr......, um....., stuff.
Coca cola - For keeping me awake.
and some more.


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LEGAL STUFF
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This may be not be reproduced under any circumstances except for personal,
private use. It may not be placed on any web site or otherwise distributed
publicly without advance written permission. Use of this guide on any other
web site or as a part of any public display is strictly prohibited, and a
violation of copyright.

This walkthrough is copyright 2003 Daniel Bruce.
All trademarks and copyrights contained in this document are owned by their
respective trademark and copyright holders.