The old adage about how movies really just do not translate into games is a tried and true formula. It never fails; well, I guess there is the oddball here and there throwing a wrench into the mix, but for the most part it is dead on. Far be it for me to keep you all in suspense on the latest verdict, so here it goes; Jumper: Griffin's Story holds firm, and is indeed a miserable game.

Clearly thrown together for the purpose of cashing in on what was supposed to be a big time movie, Griffin's Story fails to execute in nearly every category. It is almost shameful that this game was put out there; the overall lack of effort put into the title alone is astounding. Despite my severe agitation and disdain for all those involved in the production of this trite title, which led to my having to play it, I must soldier on. Stay with me because if you still want to play this game after I detail its wealth of shortcomings, then it may be time for you to seek counseling.

When I initially read the reviews for the movie, it was immediately clear that it was not a film anyone should rightfully pay ten dollars to see. Given the alternative of playing this game, that ten dollars does not seem so bad. Mainly because there are a few key differences. Whereas the movie runs roughly an hour and a half, this game will last almost five. More importantly, at least the movie would have been pretty to look at; this game looks like something a six year old doodled while pretending to listen in class. Enough of my petty self loathing; Jumper: Griffin's Story revolves around the British Guy from the movie rather than old Darth Vader himself. Griffin, the titular character, is a little more than bitter after seeing his parents murdered as a young boy, thus his life is a never ending quest to avenge them using his unique abilities to aide him in the journey. From there, you guide Griffin through a number of different locales, none of which resemble their real life counterparts, battling Paladins (Jumper hunters) and various other enemies.

How do you beat these henchman? By wailing on the 'a' button, of course. Just a simple button press will send Griffin warping all across the screen attacking anyone nearby. It's ok though because these enemies have the unique ability of appearing out of nowhere. Wait; even better you have the unique ability of regenerating health and running in circles efficiently enough for dumb bad guys not to be able to hit you. This game is overly simplistic: you fight, you kill, you occasionally use your jump ability to go over a gap or through a wall, and then you follow the arrow to your next destination. Of course, once you get there it just repeats what just occurred. That is the game in its entirety. Sure, there are treasures to collect and various weapons spread throughout, but none of them affect the game in any manner whatsoever. There is no difference between fighting with your initial knife and fighting with the longer version of the knife. All the enemies are easy, and they remain so no matter what your pompous character is carrying. As I have already stated, this game is less than enjoyable, and that is not even taking into consideration the myriad of problems that it has. The hit detection is iffy; there were a few times I found myself stuck in walls after teleporting; I would jump across gaps only to find Griffin slipping through the edge of the floor like it was quicksand; and at a couple of points I was able to walk a few feet off a ledge and stand there as if I was still on solid ground. Whew, I don't know about you but I am out of breath.