Sound-alike Titles Ramp up to Scrooge the Holidays*

Sound-alike Titles Ramp up to Scrooge the Holidays*


The Holiday Season is coming and there’s no better time for unscrupulous merchandisers to confuse grandma by introducing sound-alike products in hopes of being purchased in place of the real thing. Consumer watchdogs claim this season is going to be the worst ever for the gaming industry with the rise in popularity of video games and the ever-increasing chasm between generations.

Over the years we’ve seen sound-alike products such as The Mighty Morphine Power Rangers, Care Beers, Tickle My Elmer, and Trivial Hirsute. These products have sold in the millions simply because they were closely associated to an established and extremely popular brand. As long as these products don’t infringe on the copyright of the famous brand, by copying the exact design or premise, they cannot be classified as counterfeit or a knock off. According to law, as long as the design is different by more than ten percent, it can be considered original. So let the buyer beware, and don’t send grandma out shopping for video games. Ask for a gift certificate because after you read this, you’ll want to be protected.

One of the hottest games of the year is going to be on most gamers’ Christmas list. It’s Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2. But what most gamers don’t know is that a game with a similar-looking package is laying in wait with the name Duty Calls: Number Two.

“This is an outrage,” says Activision’s Bob Jr. Bird E. “This stupid game is all about taking a dump. The characters are soldiers in Afghanistan where they have to make their way to a toilet before their bowels give out. Apparently you’re not allowed to soil the great outdoors of Afghanistan, the world’s biggest friggin’ toilet,” yells Bird E.

“We at Activision have worked long and hard to bring Call of Duty 2 to the world,” Bird E laments, “We’ve even had two guys die making this game. And now because of these scheming bastards some kid is going to wake up Christmas morning with a poop game because his grandmother is too damn stupid to remember the proper titles of modern products.”

Consumer Games Advocate Charles LesCharle says that buyers should beware and be on the lookout for games such as Rock Bland, Grand Theft Archie, Doom: Cough, World of WarKraft Dinner, Resident Evil Knievel, and Metro’s Gear is Solid.

“These sound-alike games are absolutely ridiculous,” claims LesCharle, “Most of them only have one level and keep repeating the gameplay. Most players don’t even make it to the end of the level before they toss the game in the garbage. And the producers of these games aren’t stupid, they are all final-sale items, so you can’t return them no matter how bad they are. And they are bad. I played one called Sonik the Hedge Fund Hog. It was about making shady investments on grain futures, and it was all in Russian,” LesCharle sobs.

As long as there are no laws protecting us from sound-alike games, there is always the failsafe gift certificate. While some might say it’s the thought that counts, others retort that it doesn’t count if there is no thought. So tell grandma to wise up and pay attention this time.

*This article is presented as an exclusive Cheat Code Central feature titled “Are you dumb enough to believe this?” Please check back each Friday for the newest edition.

To top