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Bored out of your mind in church? Can’t take another Scientology lecture? Do you dread office meetings and social functions? Sneak-a-Game lets you avoid those realities by substituting them with your favorite virtual reality. With Sneak-a-Game, you can secretly play any game, on any handheld, in any location. Whether it’s an iPod, PSP, DS, or cell phone, you can play it without detection. Sneak-a-Game comes with special screen filters that allow only you to see the screen. A versatile camouflage package makes it look like you’re reading a textbook, novel, or bible. Transparent fingertip sensors let you control the game by tapping on a desk, or even on your own leg. Tiny, wireless headphones can be placed in-ear to enjoy full stereophonic audio. You’re set to go, and you’re the only one to know. “Sneak-a-Game is the perfect stealth entertainment system,” says creator, Lance Alott. “Not even a professional alcoholic—like a doctor—could have so much fun without anyone knowing.” Alott continues: “Thanks to old people, the world is a pretty boring place. We can’t sit around for an hour and listen to someone talk about something without music, visual aids, or a laugh track. We are a generation of multi-taskers, and we need constant stimulation. It’s uncomfortable, or even dangerous, for a gamer to be without his or her game. Withdrawal is a terribly inconvenient symptom.” A special film placed over the display screen gives the appearance of text. The decoding filter is placed on eyeglasses or contact lenses to allow the gamer to discreetly, but clearly, see the screen. The fingertip controllers work perfectly for most gaming applications. Clandestine tests have been performed by air traffic controllers, employees of NASA and NORAD, jail guards, judges, and the guys that pee in your soup at Applebee’s. Furd Teether of the Consumer Watchdog Committee says: “Every time some new game or invention is featured in these articles, I have to comment and look like the bad guy. These are the stupidest things ever. Of course I have to say I don’t like them. But it’s making my kids hate me. My kids’ friends hate me. My wife hates me and she’s been dead for four years. I was not implicated, so there.” But Teether wouldn’t stop there. “Listen, I’ve had it. If you want to waste your money on the crap you see in these articles then go right ahead. See if I care. I tried to warn you. You’re all idiots. Now will someone please return my wife’s ashes? That urn cost me $249.” |