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Make plans to invade that frozen wasteland to the north with President Obama – yes the real President Obama – however, the invasion is virtual… for now. President Obama has agreed to partner with the winner of the Invade Canada contest to promote the new strategy game, Superpower Invader. Gamers can download the Canadian campaign and implement their strategy for the invasion and takeover of that mysterious country to the north. All of the player’s actions will be automatically recorded and when uploaded, their results will be judged and posted for the world to see. Gamers only get one crack at it. Only the version they download can be uploaded, and it cannot be tampered with or hacked since the codes remain on a secure server. President Obama has agreed to promote Superpower Invader because he’s part owner of PassAgress, the company that developed the game. The winner of the contest will play a co-op campaign with the President. It will be televised on the Discovery Channel. Obama maintains that strategy games play an important role in training young Americans’ minds to serve their country. Such games, he claims, will ensure the American empire is not only defended but expanded. Where better to start than with the easy acquisition of the virtually undefended country of Canada. “We chose Canada because it’s close, easy, and rich in resources such as water, wood, oil, diamonds, and gold,” says PassAgress manager Tuck Findlater. “I’m surprised we haven’t actually taken it over in real life,” he laughs. “We want players to come up with the easiest and fastest method of invasion. We want the Canadians to literally hand us their country on a silver platter, with some Moosehead beer and back bacon to boot,” he chortles. Superpower Invader features ten thousand troops stationed in the northernmost states such as North Dakota, Montana, Michigan, and Washington. Players will choose the best units for the invasions as well as the weakest defense regions. The game will have various difficulty settings, but the contest will feature medium difficulty. On the easy setting, the player just has to move all the troops through Saskatchewan, Canada’s least populated, defended, and intelligent province. A recent study has shown that Americans’ general knowledge of Canada is severely lacking, so a tutorial will be included to get players up to speed. A map will be included to show what direction north is, and that Canada is not below Mexico. It will also pinpoint important headquarters such as the giant igloo where parliament is held and Canada’s dogsled military militia. Superpower Invader will be launched in time for the Holiday season. The invasion of Canada will begin on the Fourth of July. *This article is presented as an exclusive Cheat Code Central feature titled “Are you dumb enough to believe this?” Please check back each Friday for the newest edition. |