What the Golf? Summary
The sport of Golf, which is reported to go way back to the 1720s (which, for reference, is around the time the Spanish War happened), is one of the world’s most relaxing games.
This…is not that. What the Golf, developed by Triband, is a 3D comedy game that parodies the game of golf. Released on the PC and IoS, this game is strange. To the point where its tagline is: “The golf game for people who hate golf.”
And it more than lives up to its tagline. Boasting over 500+ levels, each one with its unique gimmick, the game takes players through an odd, strange journey that is quite unlike many golfing games.
What the Golf? Premise
What the Golf has a storyline if it can be called that. You play as a golf ball. Yes, a golfball, not a person playing golf, a golfball. The white ball that is meant to be hit. You control the golf balls, taking them through an abandoned factory, controlled by a A. I left in disrepair. The AI, in response, puts the player through various challenges, and all of them involve shooting a ‘ball’ into a goal in some way.
The thing is, it is not a golf ball you’re shooting. It can be a football, a soccer ball, or, even a tennis ball. That is until you’re asked to put the golf player into the goal.
Yeah, it’s that sort of game.
While the game is light on plot, such as how the factory came to be, or why you’re controlling a golf ball, it does what it needs to do. That is to make the player go through various levels, challenges, and extra stages, shooting various objects around courses, even if they defy the laws of physics and sanity in the process.
What the Golf? Main Characters
- The Golfball. The player character. Though the player takes control of many circular objects in the course of their adventure, the golf ball is what you’ll be controlling in the factory. It’s round, perfectly white, and can open doors by hitting switches hard enough.
- The A.I. There’s not much known about the A. I controlling the factory, save that it was made to improve Golf somehow.
- The Frog King. A minor presence of no note in the game, why do you ask?
What the Golf? Titles of Video Games in the Series
Ah, What the Golf is a stand-alone title, at least for right now. There is a… semi-sequel, named What the Car. This one was released on the Apple Arcade.
- What the Golf (September 2019)
- What the Car (April 2023)
What the Golf? Cheat Codes
Like many games these days, What the Golf doesn’t offer any out-and-out cheat codes that aren’t the result of extensive modding. Nevertheless, let us go over a few tips and tricks to make it through your golfing journey.
- Keep your sanity. This is a weird game, no two ways about it. You’ll have levels in space, meat moss…things growing on walls, and so much more. But never lose sight of the goal,
- Go for the crowns. Like most IoS games, there are also side objectives to complete, some of these are Crowns you can collect on a course. Collecting these will increase your score at the end, but getting them can be a bit challenging.
What the Golf? Cheat Code FAQs
Alright, with that out of the way, let’s take a look at some commonly asked questions! Or FAQs, if you prefer.
- What is the golf lore? Apparently, some scientists were so bored with golf that they decided to “spruce it up” by doing various experiments. As you can see, it got really weird.
- What is the golf sequel? While there is no true ‘sequel’ in the same vein as, say, Knights of the Old Republic 1 and 2, What the Car acts as the next game by the developing team. It has many of the same subversive elements as What the Golf.