Top 10 Sexiest Female Villains In Gaming
Top 10 Sexiest Female Villains In Gaming
I challenge you to name a combination better than gorgeous women and video games. As high as “underwater environment meets survival horror” ranks for me, I’ve got no choice but to side with the former. However, this combo can be improved—or at least made more interesting—by adding one simple element to the mix: evil. And, to the dismay of the strong female leads that don’t rely on their appearance to garner appeal (a welcomed addition to the gaming world, says this writer), this includes the ridiculous clothing that so many villainesses wear into battle. And I’m just fine with that. Balance is important, right? Nobody wants a world filled with nothing but carbon copies of Soul Calibur’s Ivy, nor would it be quite the same without a few generously endowed villainesses strutting their stuff. So, here’s to these ten hotties for adding a dash of eye candy to their respective realms.
10. Natalya Ivanova (Destroy All Humans 2)
If you were lucky enough to play this game back in its prime, you may be raising a few mental red flags right about now. Hey, this is a list of villainesses after all, not just antagonists. I’m willing to bet that if you flew around with an alien psychopath whose travel plans consist of harvesting human brains and destroying whatever he feels like, you’d be labeled a villain too. Either way, this KGB agent is evil enough in my book. I’m confident that even James Bond, the king of sexy accomplices, would be envious of Crypto (the aforementioned alien psychopath) with a model like Natalya by his side.
9. Chaos Witch Queelag (Dark Souls)
Let’s start this one with some boundary lines. In this witch’s case, let’s draw one at the waist; and for the sake of this article, I’d advise you to look up. Queelag does too many things right not to be on this list. She singlehandedly puts mermaids to shame by proving that spider-demon plus sexy witch is better than a tailfin. She also makes you seriously reconsider the value of binoculars as a starting gift, and she more than fulfills Dark Souls’ “will easily kill you in the face” boss requirement without sacrificing beauty. She is hands down the prettiest villain you’ll find in the Gothic landscape that FromSoftware has crafted. (Sorry, Gravelord Nito, you were so close.)
8. Catwoman (Mortal Kombat vs. DC Universe
I almost hope you saw this one coming, because Catwoman is an absolute classic. She is a perfect fit in the Batman franchise, and she works just as well—if not better—in this mash-up fighting game. Come on, who can argue with an old school super-villainess in a skintight leather suit? Not Bruce Wayne, not Raiden, and definitely not me. Personally, I’d like to see this girl pop up in more games in the future; put her in the next SoulCalibur for all I care.
7. Edea Kramer (Final Fantasy VIII)
Admittedly, I’m not too familiar with the Final Fantasy franchise, but even a newcomer like me knows a quality character when he sees one. Edea is a particularly strange villain due to the conditions of her, for lack of a better word, evilness. (Having your will overshadowed by a powerful sorceress is quite the condition, indeed.) Who knows what this green-eyed beauty could’ve done in FFVIII if she’d been her true self the entire time? Then again, we don’t exactly have an over-the-counter cure for possession by Ultimecia, so let’s just be happy with the sinister Edea we came to know.
6. Komari Vosa (Star Wars Bounty Hunter)
If this list were solely based on malice, Vosa would break the freaking scales. This girl is a dangerous gremlin who sprints down the thin edge of sanity. Wearing rollerblades. Blindfolded. In the rain. Honestly, she doesn’t even need her twin lightsabers; her stare alone can decapitate easily enough. And don’t get me started on her overly breathy—and infinitely creepy—voice. Dangerous instability and all, she is one of the best villains on the PlayStation 2, pushing my standards for “crazy” to a level that I’ve scarcely seen matched.
5. Tira (Soul Calibur IV)
Mind if I practice my mind reading? I’ve got a talent show audition coming up. Here goes: “What do you mean not Ivy?”
Shocking, right? Tira brings a lot to the table that Ms. Ballistic Bust doesn’t, including her nigh-patented “death by hula-hoop.” (I would like to go on record as saying that her weapon is awesome. Seriously, can you imagine the obituaries?) With her iconic pink eyes and teal hair, it doesn’t take an anime fan to tell that Tira is not only distinguished in the crowd of fighters, but just plain cute. And thanks to her arsenal of hilarious taunts, you’ll have a tough time forgetting the certain little vixen that cut you down.
4. Harley Quinn (Batman: Arkham Asylum)
There truly is no better match for a maniac than another maniac, and Harley is Joker’s dream girl. If the carnival-colored nurse outfit straight out of a masquerade ball didn’t catch your eye, Ms. Quinnzel’s coat of high-definition paint definitely will. Remember that remark in the opening paragraph about eye candy? Well, this ex-psychiatrist has graphical and feminine beauty in spades. If that’s still not enough for you, factor in her impressive gymnast skills and blatant lack of concern for human life, and you’ve got one top-tier villain.
3. Jeanne (Bayonetta)
Evidently, Jeanne studied “How to Wall-Ride Angels on a Motorcycle” while minoring in “Professional Trash Talking” back at Umbra Witch Academy. As fast and flashy as Bayonetta is, I don’t think anyone other than Jeanne could’ve made the cut for the game’s secretive antagonist. Red bodysuit and all (I’m noticing a trend here), she is over-the-top badass and can’t-even-see-the-top stylized in all the best ways.
2. Selvaria Bles (Valkyria Chronicles)
Among the enormous list of things that SEGA did right with Valkyria Chronicles, Brigadier General Bles is definitely in the top three. Are you listening, Treyarch? Because this is how you lead a charge to war. (Valkyrias in Call of Duty: Black Ops II; work on it.) This crimson-eyed War Witch has been a fan favorite from the series’ origins for her beauty, power, and rigidity. Her character, however—or more accurately, her remarkably well-written female lead—won more people over than anything, which is particularly impressive given her generous… proportions, shall we say? (I never said all of the ladies on this list were shallowly written, did I? Not to mock the rest of the lineup, of course. Well, at least not all of them.)
1. Excella (Resident Evil 5)
As fun as it was at times, we all know that RE5 wasn’t exactly Capcom’s moment of triumph. But if we were to start a list of its redeeming qualities—which would take all of ten seconds to write—Excella would be the best way to kick it off. This woman may as well have a neon sign over her head reading “Classy and I know it” to show just how much she loves to flaunt her aristocratic qualities. Even the most hardcore Ada Wong fans can’t deny that Excella is a great combination of wits, beauty, and just enough narcissism to make her fun to hate. And she just so happens to look absolutely stunning in that white dress—a charitable name for the revealing curtain she spends most of the game in.
Do me a favor, readers, and tell me who I missed in the comments, why I should’ve included them, or who I put too high or low on the list; I’m sure you were shocked to see at least one villainess’ absence. After all, I can only draw from my own gaming experiences. So let me know who I’m missing, because I’m genuinely curious.
Date: October 29, 2012
*The views expressed within this article are solely the opinion of the author and do not express the views held by Cheat Code Central.*