Microsoft: Sights Set on Sony!*

Microsoft: Sights Set on Sony!*


The successful advertising campaign launched by Apple Computer that pits a nerdy PC guy against a cool Mac user has Microsoft retaliating. The megalithic corporation admits Apple is taking a bite out of their core sales. The company claims the damage has been done and may be irreversible, but Bill Gates and the gang have vowed not to let the same thing happen to their coveted gaming system, the Xbox 360.

Microsoft is going on the attack, and Sony is their target. Microsoft, which at this time enjoys a third of the gaming market, solely with Xbox 360 and related accessories. It’s predicted that this holiday season Microsoft will be the undisputed leader in the gaming industry with a market share of nearly 50 per-cent.

“That’s a huge percentage,” says market analyst and advertising guru Reggie Nippal. “It’s no wonder that Microsoft wants to protect it, and to do so they are going to make ads similar to the Mac ads, only different. They asked me to design an ad campaign, similar to Apple’s, only different. So I did. It’s a little different, but there are some similarities,” Nippal explains.

“Basically we start with a hot looking babe. She starts bad mouthing the Xbox 360, saying things like good looking people like her would never play that thing, hotties prefer the PS3. Then we go in for a close up, and all of a sudden you are able to see that this hot girl is really a guy. That’s evident when we go tight on the bikini briefs. That should make a few people sick,” Nippal chortles.

Another ad campaign shows a group of homeless people tossing hundreds of PS3s on a fire to keep warm while fighting to the death over the only Xbox 360 available. In another ad WWII-era Japan is allying with Nazi Germany to drop millions of PS3s on Pearl Harbor, only to be thwarted by the dropping of one Xbox 360 on Hiroshima.

“Sophisticated gamers know that the Xbox 360 is the superior machine,” Nippal claims, “but the rest of the population has to be tricked into believing it, even though it’s true. The general public has no idea what’s good for them, they only know what looks cool on TV. And we’re fine with that, because people like that make people like me rich,” Nippal laughs. “All you have to do is look at the idiots that are sending in their unwanted gold in envelopes to those unscrupulous companies. I mean, unwanted gold? What idiot doesn’t want gold? I’m going to come out with a commercial that asks people to send me their unwanted hundred dollar bills, and I’ll send them a much rarer, and much more beautiful fifty dollar bill. It looks so good that it comes with a frame so you can show all your friends when they come over to play your Xbox 360,” Nippal concludes.

*This article is presented as an exclusive Cheat Code Central feature titled “Are you dumb enough to believe this?” Please check back each Friday for the newest edition.

To top